Some Jokes to Brighten up Your Week.

What Does it Mean to be British?

“Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture & watch American shows on a Japanese TV. And the most British thing of all?

 Suspicion of anything foreign.”

My Teenage Son.

My teenage son told me that he had sex with the neighbour’s daughter last night for the first time.
 
“Well done, son,” I said, “I hope you used something though?”

He replied, “Yeah, a balaclava!”

Thank You Peter M. for the joke.


He Said To Me.

He said to me . . . I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it
I said to him . . . You wear pants don’t you?

He said to me . . ….. Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said … That’s a good idea – you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said to me. … What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him . …..Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

Thank You Melissa for the joke.

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2 Responses to Some Jokes to Brighten up Your Week.

  1. travelrat says:

    Had to share this one; it really happened this morning:

    There’s a manufacturer’s recall out on my car, and I made an appointment for today to have the work done. And, she said to me:

    ‘Are you driving, or taking the bus?’

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