An Angel/The Reward (Weekend Jokes)

An Angel

Three guys were fishing in a lake one day, when an angel appeared in the boat. When the three astonished men had settled down enough to speak, the first guy asked the angel humbly,

“I’ve suffered from back pain ever since I took shrapnel in the War … Could you help me?”

“Of course,” the angel said, and when she touched the man’s back, the man felt relief for the first time in years.

The second guy who wore very thick glasses and had a hard time reading and driving. He asked if the angel could do anything about his poor eyesight. The angel smiled, removed the man’s glasses and tossed them into the lake. When they hit the water, the man’s eyes cleared and he could see everything distinctly.

When the angel turned to the third guy, the guy put his hands out defensively — “Don’t touch me!” he cried, “I’m on a disability pension.”

Corny Fish Jokes

  • Why are dolphins cleverer than humans?
    Within 3 hours they can train a man to stand at the side of a pool and feed them fish!
  • What kind of money do fishermen make?
    Net profits
  • Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
    They have their own scales.
  • Why are fish so smart?Β 
    Because they live in schools.

The Reward

One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish.

About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family.

“You aren’t going to catch many fish that way,” said the businessman to the fisherman, “you should be working rather than lying on the beach!”

The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, “And what will my reward be?”

“Well, you can get bigger nets and catch more fish!” was the businessman’s answer.

“And then what will my reward be?” asked the fisherman, still smiling.

The businessman replied, “You will make money and you’ll be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!”

“And then what will my reward be?” asked the fisherman again.

The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman’s questions. “You can buy a bigger boat, and hire some people to work for you!” he said.

“And then what will my reward be?” repeated the fisherman.

The businessman was getting angry. “Don’t you understand? You can build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!”

Once again the fisherman asked, “And then what will my reward be?”

The businessman was red with rage and shouted at the fisherman, “Don’t you understand that you can become so rich that you will never have to work for your living again! You can spend all the rest of your days sitting on this beach, looking at the sunset. You won’t have a care in the world!”

The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, “And what do you think I’m doing right now?”

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75 Responses to An Angel/The Reward (Weekend Jokes)

  1. wolke205 says:

    Bwahahaaa I would tell the Angel the same like the third man πŸ˜€ Happy Weekend πŸ™‚

  2. Good start to the weekend!!

  3. Hahaha! Very funny, a little corny, but mostly TRUE!!! ha! That’s what makes them great : )

  4. sporepigfish says:

    love it! great ones. especially the quiz about the fishes! Please stop by to read some of my funny stories..

    • magsx2 says:

      Hi sporepigfish,
      Glad you enjoyed the jokes. πŸ˜€
      Have a good weekend, and Thank You for taking the time to comment, I will certainly check out your stories. πŸ™‚

  5. I always love the jokes. The last one is pretty funny, but has a real lesson there, don’t you think?

  6. El Guapo says:

    Great jokes, Loved the last one!
    Enjoy your weekend, Magsx2!

  7. Love “The Reward.”

    Have a fantastic weekend!

  8. starlaschat says:

    My favorite is the last one “The Reward” so profound. :+) Have a good Weekend. :+)

  9. Windsmoke. says:

    First one gets my vote. I would rather be cured of a disability and forgo the pension anyday :-).

  10. Lynn says:

    Very funny Mags!! I love it!! πŸ™‚

  11. dearrosie says:

    I think the last one should be obligatory reading for all of us no matter where we live.

  12. Thanks for sharing a few laughs. We need to raise the level of fishermen somehow. Maybe a TV program; “So you think you can fish!.” Elect a fishing idol once per season. Give out a title or and award for; “Worst dressed” “Most worm gunk under fingernails” “Best Poacher” But then everyone would expect more out of us. Forget I said anything.

    • magsx2 says:

      Hi Waldo,
      Great ideas, but your right they would expect more. πŸ˜† Glad you enjoyed the jokes.
      Have a great weekend, and Thank You for taking the time to comment.

  13. Ha! Ha! Sitting on the beach watching the sunset sounds good to me. I would be the worst fisherman (woman) because I don’t have the heart to catch them! I’m fine with just watching them jump. Anyway, thanks for the laughs. πŸ™‚

  14. malc50 says:

    πŸ™‚ Thanks Mags. Havagoodweekend! Cheers, Mal.

    • magsx2 says:

      Hi Mal
      I hope you can enjoy yourself a bit this weekend, don’t work so hard, I know easier said than done. πŸ˜€
      I hope you have a great weekend.

      • malc50 says:

        Thanks Mags. I actually enjoy the work, but just wish there were more hours in each day! I have 17 hours a week of lectures and tutorials, plus preparation and marking – it’s called semi-retirement, and I’m loving every minute of it! Cheers.

  15. Selma says:

    Love the angel joke. LOL πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜†
    You tell the best jokes, Mags. Have a great weekend!

  16. ~mimo~ says:

    Great joke! Thank you for the laugh! πŸ™‚

  17. jmgoyder says:

    They’re all wonderful!

  18. Excellent mate , love the fisherman joke
    Aussie Ian

  19. tempo says:

    I really like the Angel joke…I think I know that bloke..

  20. travelrat says:

    No doubt you’ve heard the cliche ‘Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach him to fish, and you’ll feed him for life’?

    My friend says ‘Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach him to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day and drink beer’

  21. jakesprinter says:

    Your Angel is great Mags he,he,he, πŸ™‚

  22. E.C. says:

    πŸ˜† Perfect! These are spot-on. Thanks for the morning laughs! πŸ˜†

  23. Rebekah says:

    Really great jokes, Mags … thanks for the laughs!

    For some reason, I really liked the last one..

  24. WordsFallFromMyEyes says:

    I love your bad day’s fishing beats a good day’s working quote – that’s great :). And the fishing joke VERY funny. My sister is on a disability pension & she would respond that exact same way, I am sure!

  25. Cafe23 says:

    Ha! So good! That last one is funny but it’s also kind of insightful in that we all have this mindset that we have to work our butts off all our lives so we can enjoy the “finer” things for the future and yet we end up wasting so much of the present just stressed out and burnt out!

    • magsx2 says:

      Hi Cafe23,
      Different people will see the last joke in different ways, it is a bit of a mind spinner. The other way of looking at the joke, is if you want to have great holidays see the world, own nice things you will have to work and relax later. πŸ˜€
      Have a great weekend.

  26. Tony McGurk says:

    The 1st one made me think of this part of “The Life Of Brian

    The last one was a goodie too

  27. Great tale about the fisherman! It’s important to know when you have enough. πŸ™‚ And I’m glad to see a dolphin joke in there — as I mentioned they’re my favorite animal! Happy Weekend.

    • magsx2 says:

      Hi happykidshappymon,
      I thought I would include a small dolphin joke, seeing as my last post was about dolphins, I so glad you enjoyed the jokes.
      You also have a great weekend. πŸ˜€

  28. Tony McGurk says:

    Hi Mags, no I won’t be using the WP.com site anymore so you are free to delete it’s RSS feed.

  29. Thanks for the weekend funnies!

  30. aFrankAngle says:

    Hey Mags. Given my weekend, I’m closing it with this post as opposed to as my Saturday morning opener. With the fishing theme, the first was my fav. Thanks for the chuckles.

  31. Red Nomad OZ says:

    Wait! Let me guess … hubby was off on a boys only fishing trip this weekend??!! LOVE the fishing jokes – but the disability pension one REALLY made me laugh!!

  32. I like the fishing one. I have no problem with people fishing for food but I can’t understand those people who just torture fish for pleasure or to win a competition. I had to cover fishing competitions when I was working for a newspaper in France. The organizers were very proud that the fish caught were thrown back into the water and only “a few die from stress”. They even had a competition for children, so this mentality is going to be perpetuated for at least another generation. People become hysterical when kittens and cattle are tortured, but torturing fish is accepted as normal. Why?

  33. Fergiemoto says:

    Ha, ha, ha! I love “the reward”.

  34. BoJo Photo says:

    Great jokes and a good day for them!!!:)

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